Huuuhhhh....

This is how I feel today. So far it has been a crazy week, emotional.
My mom got her results from her karyotype and it came back normal, 46 XX. She does not have the translocation. My dad did not get tested but he has two children, me and my half sister. His family did not struggle with infertlity or losses. I am pretty conveived that I am de novo. I came to realize that I might be the first one to pass this on to a child and it is very hard to take in :(

On another note, I have taken a HPT on Tuesday, BFP (although the line is faint) but I started cramping (very intense) and spotting soon after. The spotting did not return today, except a yellowish discharge and no cramping, occasional pain. I think that the faint line and the spotting/cramping is just a sign that once again...this is not the one. We will have to see. I hope that if it isn't meant to be it will happen quick so I can move on. I was doing so good for myself. I want to keep going. If it is a good one......... well..........we shall see.....