Tuesday, December 21, 2010


Well, I do not have anything much to say about BT, testings, or TTC at this point. Life is pretty calm (somewhat). In the 2ww right now but I already know what the outcome will be. Hubby and I have been pretty busy so romantic time has been limited.
BUT I am enjoying this Holiday Season to the fullest! I am not going to miss out on Christmas this year. The Grinch stole mine last year by escorting my angel #4 to a happy place on Christmas Eve day. All plans were canceled and I felt devastated. I was hoping that I would be successfully pregnant by now but it is not the case............. so I am trying to enjoy life. I have picked up reading and I am enjoying great books. I immerse myself in my job (I own a dance school and I teach alot of classes throughout the week). I am on break right now and it feels good. We are putting all of our recital ideas together and it keeps my mind occupied! Some of the instructors came over today and we had a good time, we had some great laughs! Me trying to re-enact Aretha Franklin RESPECT was a hoot! ha!

I know many of you are dealing with infertility. Please do not lose hope! I wish you a very Merry Christmas!!!! Enjoy your Holidays! You deserve it!

Sunday, December 12, 2010

On Hold

Well, I realized that my insurance only covers tests and anything related to infertlity 50% with a $5000 lifetime cap........ uggghhh..... bummer. I have to pay half of the HSG test. I was able to call hospital and schedule payments spread over a period of several months.
My OB/GYN wanted to perform one more Blood test but it has to be done at a lab and it will be billed under infertility so I know it is going to cost me. Unfortunately, I cannot afford it at the moment. So this test is on HOLD. I'll wait, maybe February or March I'll be able to do it. The Doc thinks that there is nothing wrong but we are just performing all testings to rule out anything else wrong other than BT.
What is unfair is that my insurance is crappy for infertlity but great for pregnancy!!!! or anything else in that matter.......... uggghhhh........

But anyhow, I keep my spirit high in this Holiday Season and cannot wait for some time off so my Hubby and I can relax and have some fun ;-)

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Last Tests

OB/GYN Office called last week and there is one more thing to test and then I am done. So far, all is normal! Nothing else wrong. Even ovulation hormone is in excellent range! That's great! Ohhhhhh..... BT, why are you so cruel?
But the Holidays are here and this is my favorite time of the year so I am making the best of it!!!!!

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Blood Work Results

Well, I got the results from the progesterone testing and thyroid function (yes, they did test both things. If you read my previous post, the script from Doc was a little confusing but got sorted out).
Everything came back normal. Nothing wrong there. Well.......... that's good.......... It just means that the translocation is the only thing in the way........ Ggggrrrr....... Just the luck of the draw from here. I just have to stay positive and cross my fingers that it will happen one day!

Huuuhhhhh but then today, I got my AF :-( Oh well, I guess my focus will be on enjoying the Holidays and Xmas, my favorite time of the year. I hope this one is better than last years (m/c #4 happened on Xmas eve day).

Amazingly, I find myself in a good mood today........I guess that's good!

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Blood Work

Hello everyone! So I went to get some blood work done yesterday at my OB/GYN. It was supposed to be cd21 testing (progesterone) and thyroid I believe. After the nurse was done with the blood and needle part (yikes.....), I asked her if they would also test the thyroid (the doc had said that it should be checked also, just in case). But when we looked at my chart (the hand written part of what doc said should be tested), the nurse was a little confused. On the line that said cd21 testing, the cd21 was crossed out with a scribble on top of it and on the remaining part of the line it said something about the thyroid. The nurse said she was going to find out for me if both things would be checked (progesterone + thyroid). I was a little pi**** off. Why not just checking all that needs to be checked and be clear about it??? When I get the results next week, I will have to ask what was tested. If for some reason, only one thing was checked, I know I will have to take the bull by the horns again, open my mouth, make an appointment, and ask if this or this or this should be tested. I get so frustrated sometimes. I know that my BT is most likely the cause of my 5 m/c's....... but I would like to make sure everything else is ok!!!!! We never know..... I might get lucky and a good little egg might come by someday..... ugghhhh........... sorry, I just had to let it out!

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Baby Shower

Yep..... today was fun........ I went to my bestfriend's baby shower for Baby #2. I love her more than anything and think of her more as my sister than my friend. I actually started TTC before she was even married or thought of having children. It is weird how things turn out in life. Here I was today, after 5 years of her being married, and celebrating her baby #2 who is due in 3 weeks. Although it is hard, I do not wish any bad things for her and I am very happy for her and hubby. Her and I suffered a m/c pretty much at the same time about 3 years ago (it was her first, my 2nd). She went on and achieved motherhood. I'm still trying.... I feel so angry sometimes because our children should have been growing up together. So many memories that could have been, do not exist. She has been the bestfriend in the world by being so careful when I am around, making sure that I was involved in her first born's life as much as possible. She made me the Godmother and told me the day he was born that I was the chosen one after I had witnessed his birth. He loves me very much and this eases the pain that I feel sometimes! She is very hopeful for me and I wish that one day I can join her in motherhood!

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Grrrrrr...... I Spoke too Fast!

OB/GYN office called. HSG came back normal...... whoohoo!!!! At least, that's some good news. Repeated m/c's not happening because of uterus!!! Next round of testings, next week.....

Waiting for HSG Results

Well, it's been almost a week now and still haven't heard anything about the HSG test from last Friday. The physician assistant told me that day that it seems like everything was fine, no blocked tubes, uterus seem fine. Still no formal results from doc. I called OB/GYN yesterday and left a message but no one called me back. It says for tests results to leave a voicemail and someone will call back...... huuuhhhh???.... I have to go back next Wednesday for progesterone testing. I guess if I still hear nothing from them, I will ask that day!

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

New to Blogging

Hello Everyone!!! Well, I am new to the blogging world..... ummmm, not entirely. I have been following blogs from numerous people in order to get answers after I was diagnosed three years ago with Balanced Translocation :( I have done tons of reading, followed several discussion boards but I have never actually wrote anything. Lately, I have been thinking about writing about my experience. I wanted to write a book but then I thought that starting a blog and being able to share thoughts might be a great way to share what I have been going through with other people. Well, after 5 miscarriages...... here we are........ still with an empty womb..... An Empty French Womb!
 Although the road to motherhood has been pretty rough so far, I stay positive and have a pretty good spirit!